A salesperson who listens first instead of imposing a canned monologue conveys something entirely different to would-be customers:

Listener | Talker

Considerate | Presumptuous
Opportunistic | Egotistic
Authentic | Phony
Transparent | Underhanded
Professional | Showy
Interested in meeting needs |Interested in making money
Builds trust | Builds tension

The truth is that listening from the outset conveys precisely what needs to be conveyed to customers in order to gain their trust. Eventually, a listening salesperson then has the grounds to not only ask for business, but ask for business with confidence.

You see, there is power in listening. And to avoid a short circuit in your sales career, you must tap into that power on a regular basis. You must adopt a new approach to selling, one whose primary aim is to listen and learn, not to chatter and close. You must regularly engage in the following five conversation practices, which I discuss in greater detail in my upcoming book Killing the Sale due out in January 2004.

When these five practices are prevalent in your method of selling, you'll find that your sales efforts establish more trust, and subsequently, produce more business.

1. Forget about the sale. Not for good. But you at least need to put the sale on the back burner of your mind so you can focus on really learning the needs and the values of your prospects. That's because sales are most often the by-product of effective, genuine conversation. Remember that you cannot be certain that your solution offering to a prospect is worth a hill of beans to them unless you've taken the time to know what it is they're looking for. So put your agenda aside for once and listen to what your customers are telling you.

2. Ask don't argue. Don't underestimate the importance of asking the right questions. If all you do is chat about the weather and world news you won't learn anything about your prospects' needs. When you enter into a selling dialogue, do so with a disciplined set of questions that you've planned ahead of time. Ask questions that will help you determine whether your product or service is the right fit. And if it's not, don't try to argue your way to a sale.

3. Listen with your fingers. Whether you're on the phone or face-to-face with prospects, taking notes is the most efficient way to ensure that the information you're gathering is sinking in. Not only that, if a prospect is aware that you are taking notes they will often see it as a sign that you are genuinely interested in what they have to say - and that you intend to use the information to help them.

4. Seek to understand. Verify what your prospects tell you. Make certain that you understand your prospects' needs and values precisely. Confirm the expectations that they've shared with you. When prospects tell you that they need something, ask them why they need it that way. If you must have an agenda in a prospecting situation, make it understanding your prospects needs and values as well as your own. Don't assume you know. Know you know.

5. Listen again. When appropriate and with your prospects' approval, record your prospecting meetings. Explain to your prospects up front that the purpose of recording the meeting is so that you can constantly improve your efforts to meet their needs as well as the needs of your existing clients. Explain to them that it is your desire (and it should be) to never neglect or overlook what they tell you in a meeting; and although you will be taking notes and listening intently, the recording is so that you can review what has been discussed in the meeting to ensure that your efforts are perfectly customized to their expectations. Not only will this practice be a gesture of your best intentions, it will prove to be a great teaching tool for constant self-improvement.

In the end, to employ the skill of listening you must begin your sales relationships with a connection mentality that compels you to look to your customers for the key to their business. In other words, assume nothing about what, why, when, how, or where a customer wants and needs something. Make no presumptions about what they might perceive as valuable. Just ask, listen, and seek to understand. And when you can do that, you'll not only be in a pole position to win your customers' business, you'll have come a long way toward winning their hearts.

Our company was one of three sales training organizations vying for a contract with a very reputable prospect looking for ongoing training for its employees. One of the caveats that the prospect had shared with us is that they would be interviewing all three companies before a decision would be made. It wasn't an ideal situation, but we looked at it as a great opportunity to set ourselves apart from the others in our arena. Furthermore, we could appreciate the prospect';s desire to make a well-thought-out decision.

When the former president of our firm and I arrived at the prospects' corporate offices, we were escorted into the top floor conference room. As the prospects filed into the room, you could cut the tension with a knife. Without a word, we knew that our customary selling approach had become all-the-more important. There was the Head of Production, Head of Training, and four regional managers. And since they saw this as an interview of us, after a few pleasantries the Head of Production said, "So, tell us about The Duncan Group."

We knew that was our moment of truth. How we responded right then would set the tone for the meeting and eventually determine whether we would establish a new business relationship. "Thanks for asking," I replied. "The Duncan Group is many things to many companies. Our over-arching goal is to help our clients and their employees become more successful through our training partnerships and programs. But we can't even begin to explain how we might do that for you until we learn what's important about this training program to you."

That was the key. For 45 minutes we dialogued. We talked to all six of them. We followed a disciplined questioning process. We listened closely to ascertain their values and needs. We learned as much as we could about how and where we could add value. And at the end of 45 minutes of asking questions and listening to their answers, we told them how we felt we could help them.

Like clockwork, the prospects called on the day they said they would have a decision to tell us that they had awarded the contract to our company. Since we always make a habit of asking clients why they chose us, after thanking them for their trust, our company's former president posed the same question to them. Our new clients replied, "You seemed to be the only firm that knew what we were looking for." Our former pres then asked what the other vendors did that they didn't like. Our new client replied, "The others told us what they thought they could do for us; but none of it really seemed to fit." In short, the others hadn't listened. We, on the other hand, had taken a much different selling approach. And in the end, it meant a six-figure contract for our company.

"Most people," wrote Ernest Hemmingway, "never listen." And he's right ... especially when it comes to salespeople. Consider the following statistics from the International Listening Association:

• 75% of the time that we are supposedly listening, we are distracted, preoccupied or forgetful
• We only remember 20% of what we hear
• Less than 2% of professionals have had formal educational experience with listening
• We listen at 125-250 words per minute, but think at 1000-3000 words per minute

The problem, however, is that listening is the key to learning how to sell to your customers. There's no other way around it.

• To understand your customers' needs, you must know how to listen. If you don't understand their needs, you can't offer them compelling solutions that fit. As a result, dealing with a lot of objections will become a standard scenario in your business.
• To ascertain your customers' values, you must know how to listen. If you don't know what they value, you will often make sales offerings that fall short of their expectations. Again, this means you will have to overcome their objections to close the sale. Worse yet, it breeds distrust. And without trust, you're fighting an uphill battle.
• To discern when you have received buy-in from your customers, you must know how to listen. If you don't know when you've received buy-in from customers, you will lack the confidence to the close the deal when the time is right.
• To obtain repeat and referral business from clients, you must know how to listen. Even if you manage to guess your way to a sale, clients won't give you more business if they didn't enjoy doing business with you in the first place...if they know you didn't respect them from the start. Furthermore, obtaining repeat business from clients requires an increased level of intimacy with regard to their needs and desires. If you didn't listen for those things in the beginning, you'll be in deeper water when you try to go back for more business.

You see, in the sales industry, listening is more necessary than just about any skill you might possess. That's because in any selling situation, listening must come first if you desire to build the kind of trust that leads to not only one sale, but multiple sales from every customer.

For instance, creativity in sales is important ... but if you're creative in your prospecting attempts, but then fail to listen during your selling attempts, creativity doesn't matter. Getting a person in the door is easy. Talking them into staying for dinner is another story - it's a lot more intimate.

Integrity in sales is crucial ... but even if you're a salesperson of your word and never accept shady practices, if you fail to meet your customers' expectations, integrity won't matter. Always showing up for dinner on time is great; but if you forget the drinks and dessert, being prompt doesn't matter.

Professionalism in sales is vital ... but even if you're the best dressed, finest spoken, most doting salesperson around, if all you offer is what you think your customers value, professionalism is often a waste. A 16-ounce filet mignon may look good to you; but it won't look good if you offer it to a vegetarian.

The bottom line is that to set yourself up for success as a sales professional, you cannot overlook the foundational importance of your ability to listen, and listen well. According to the International Listening Association, listening is responsible for 85% of what we learn in life - off and especially on the job. And in the sales industry you must first understand how to learn about your customers before you can earn their business.